in tears.... tears for ears and for the years when we forget

because I love symmetry, balance, equilibrium and synchrony (what a lovely description of myself, so simple, so perfect, so limited between it's mirroring endings), well, where there is a start there must be an end. obviously - my logic can never release me. but, in order to have my conscious empty of whatever remorse, I must follow my logic and obey my sense of usefulness, or to be excessively clear, I must obey my senses under the un-condemnable excuse of following a logical structure of the mind.
so here I come with the topic. I just found myself a lamentable, plaintive person. and now I wonder at two things: 1: why on earth would someone who is plaintive and lost among complaints choose a name like inlinification and 2: why there is no noun to describe a plaintive person? I've looked over the dictionary and all I can find are adjectives. Is this what I am? an adjective? well, if it were so, I couldn't stand much against it cause with my lack of form and measure I could hardly fit into a noun, but still...... if I can find a name for my desire - inlinification - and make a noun of it, why can't I define myself through a noun?
a strange matter to pound upon. in case I still feel like pounding upon anything at this time of the day when the hill-cross is gleaming at me.
forget.
and sleep.
so that you can wake up and start it all over agin